My husband laid a HUGE truth bomb on me recently after a very big adult fit I had thrown for a few days in a row about different things that were going on. You've had one right?! Sometimes it just needs to happen safely...get it out and then regroup.
The conversation partially went like this:
Matt: Do you think you're creating some of this yourself?
Me: RUDE!!! (Followed by laughing and pouting at the same time. LOL!)
It's funny. (There's a point to all this but I have to tell you this little flashback moment I'm having--keep reading )
We've known each other since 2001, started dating in 2003, and I've always said he would be such a good therapist. Seriously. Everyone feels safe with him, he has a grounded energy to him and he just thinks outside of the box. (He is a Cancer sun sign so---there's the lovey part haha) Anyway...he brings be back down to earth and helps ME process when I'm having a hard time seeing the forest through the tress. Look, even a coach needs coached sometimes. No shame! Just here having a human experience.
Anyway. My next words to him were...well yes (tail between my legs ).
Truth is, since the week leading up to him deploying and while he was gone, I was a damn mess. Not like my usual hot mess that I just embrace but like a mess mess.
It definitely crossed my mind that I was creating some of the unnecessary chaos and hurt and negativity.
And look, I FULLY understand this:
What you think, becomes.
What you think, you create more of.
All of this I have been preaching (and living/working on) for YEARS.
All of this I teach my coaching clients frequently, how to work through what comes up.
I KNOW how to sit, heal and rise through this.
Truth be told, a lot of it felt justified, filled with heartache, grief with the loss of my friend, mom life, etc.
None of it is an excuses.
Feelings are ALWAYS valid. Always.
I know I can do better though.
So, I decided to choose different NOW in that moment.
Because, if I've been made aware of what's going on and don't do something about it - I know I will stay in this cycle.
I don't want to be in this cycle.
I tell you this today, because I want you to know:
Just because you want to be positive all the time doesn't mean you won't get down sometimes.
Just because you have the tools to rise above doesn't mean you won't ever have funks or tough times.
We ARE, after all, just here having a human experience (this is obviously important because I've said it twice now)
Difference is:
You DO have the tools to move forward.
And the awareness to notice and choose again.
It DOES get easier over time when tough situations arise to shift.
If you're in a funk or a tough time, take a step back with me now.
Take a BIG deep breath in.
Exhale - - Let it ALL go.
Ask yourself:
What is going on?
What can I do differently?
What do I need?
What can I do now that brings me joy?
How can I move forward with a different view?
You got this.
Make sure to connect with me on IG: @xo_christianjones
Have a great day!